Keeping Fear in the Passenger Seat

Fear

I had to name
over and over again.

Fear

I had to guide
into the backseat
like a new puppy,
reaching back my back
while she barked
or whined.

“There, there” I’d say,
and try to drive,
move her body
as she worked her way
into my lap or under foot
between the brakes
and gas.

Screaming “No”
does not work
without a “Yes”
to move into.

I’d have to pull the
car over to position her letting her come for
the ride, but only as
a passenger.

Fear

I can’t keep from jumping
jumping
without a bone, toy
or distraction.

My fear is protective, untrained and hyperactive.

I’ve had to learn to settle in and down

when fear bounds and leaps

and I’m the target.

Patience, a skill I’ve not yet mastered

we train and train

and practice.