GO!<\/span><\/strong><\/p>\n \n<\/b><\/b><\/p>\n
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My last day on earth (not tomorrow).\u00a0 I will be a quiet soul with a blaring spirit, a 92-year old woman with a meditation practice who goes to church on Sundays. I will spend weekday mornings writing letters to politicians. Some days I\u2019ll be sipping spicy sweet tea as I type. I\u2019ll write poetry and maybe journal but there won\u2019t be much memoir I haven\u2019t put to the page. Afternoons will be for naps and reading and dinner with guests eating food and munching laughter.<\/p>\n
My ego will still be with me but a rainbow of lighter hues as opposed to the black and white forms of younger days. I\u2019ll have survived my spouse, most of my family of origin\u00a0and my friends \u2013 grief will be my biggest burden to bear.<\/p>\n
I will live in funky senior housing and will have artwork on the walls, crafts for the little ones who come over, cats and a tiny window garden for herbs and flowers.<\/p>\n
My prayer is that my daughter will have an enormous circle of family and friends. She will be happily involved with cousins, nieces and nephews, have her own kids and partner should she choose. I hope she will want to visit me and if she doesn\u2019t I hope she will not oblige herself or be dutiful. She will still feel nurtured, heard and loved. There will be nothing left to tell or resolve if I slip away. She will have already faced or let go of the ways I let her down knowing my best may have not been good enough for her.<\/p>\n
Still, she will know love, when real and palpable is never ending. That means death is no longer the swan song I once feared it was. She can choose to tether herself to my spirit like a soft blanket she rubs against her cheek or tosses off as she needs.<\/p>\n
Saturdays I keep open for young writers and abuse survivors to come and visit. They will ask, how did you survive, thrive, find self-acceptance, learn to be intimate with others and keep writing? Weren\u2019t you afraid to trust, mother and speak your truth? <\/i>They will want to know my answers and not be bored or roll their eyes. My secrets will be the prized possessions I will not hoard or itemize or hang on a neck that doesn\u2019t want to wear them.<\/p>\n
Pain, love and yoga poses will be things my heart can easily hold. Wishing for more, better, different and later will be the things I got over.<\/p>\n
My ego will not put me in headstands or relationships which put kinks in my neck or too much weight on my shoulders. I won\u2019t try to hold postures or on to people where the flexibility lacks. Dangerous will no longer excite or entice but seem tiresome. Nor will saying yes to all forms of volunteerism or self-sacrifice seem noble as injures happen from hyperextension as well as other toxins.<\/p>\n
In 2059 I will have learned that if the entire planet is training for a triathlon but I need to sink on the mat for a child\u2019s pose to rest and recoup I won\u2019t even think twice or apologize. Until ready, I will not rise. Sticky notes will no longer litter my heart or psyche telling me what to do, feel and how to behave. I will trust myself to respond in the moment.<\/p>\n
Before I go on to the next world I will touch every plant, animal, shell and sea glass I have ever loved. Then, without leashing or collaring me, the dogs will come, in packs to lead me. I will be brought to a tribe of spirits in the afterlife.\u00a0 There will be love and tears and a place, a balcony to sit, once daily at least, to look down on the loved ones yet to arrive.<\/p>\n
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It doesn’t cost anything but that’s\u00a0not what the free means. It’s\u00a0YOU that gets\u00a0to be free. Are you ready? Let\u00a0the spring cleaning begin\u00a0in your psyche so you have more room for\u00a0the lusciousness of\u00a0life. If\u00a0you don’t free-write but want to try, please\u00a0see my piece on how. The sample I’m sharing this week is one I got form\u00a0Nancy […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":[],"categories":[63,54],"tags":[93,94],"yoast_head":"\n
Free-Writing Friday: (1) Where You Practice Being Free - Heal Write Now for Trauma Survivors & Adults Abused as Children<\/title>\n \n \n \n \n \n \n \n \n \n \n \n \n \n \n \n \n \n\t \n\t \n\t \n