Comments on: Lena Dunham & Why Sibling Molestation is Not Amusing or Sexual Play

By: Alan

Alan — Sun, 16 Nov 2014 14:42:25 +0000

When I , who came from a core family that had none of any sexual predation, read these accounts and have been exposed to it at all closely just in talking to people who have, such as an abused foster child and a niece of mine, I get pretty blown away. More people than most folks recognize, live in a world where predation is a norm. The “power” person sets the standard and the victim gets to try and figure out what should or shouldn’t be okay while the predator doesn’t really care. I’ve seen a bunch of Dunham’s stuff, which as theater can be absorbing. I’m new to this blog, so I don’t know all the history between Cissy and Dunham, but Dunham seems like a pretty good rationalizer if I get the drift. Also, from my perspective, almost as chilling as the behavior of the predator is, in some ways, the way some people who are in some way dependent on the predator stick by them even after they’ve been exposed is at best, sad, and at worst, enabling. That, I have witnessed in my extended family and it’s blown apart just about every relationship within that immediately affected family.

By: Cissy White

Cissy White — Wed, 12 Nov 2014 15:52:20 +0000

In reply to D.

I’m furious at her defenders as well – not the ones who disagree – but the ones who mimic, mock and make even the questioning of what she describes appear to only be a right-wing conspiracy by those who are bashing feminists and who say those of us who have questions are not really feminists.

By: D

Wed, 12 Nov 2014 15:06:29 +0000

I think it’s very gracious of you to accept lena’s apology. But your story makes me furious at her defenders, and that awful tumblr (I won’t name it here)

By: Cissy White

Cissy White — Tue, 11 Nov 2014 19:09:03 +0000

In reply to Karen. Thanks for stopping by and commenting. Your writing is fabulous. We talk about bullying so much now which is I think is great but this topic is still hard for many to discuss. I'm glad more of us are speaking up and out from our own experiences and talking to our children as well so they better understand boundaries, what they are and how to respect their own and others.

By: Karen

Karen — Tue, 11 Nov 2014 19:02:35 +0000

I have a son and a daughter who are close in age and I see the natural curiosity between them. But we’ve also talked a lot about what it means to have boundaries, something no one ever taught me. I was molested by a girl who bullied me and even though we were the same age, the fact that she had power over me as a bully made all the difference between sexual exploration and molestation. What you’ve shared is really powerful and thought provoking.